Bit Of A 'Good Vibes' Kick
‘I booked a TV show!’
‘That film that I starred in just got into TIFF!’
‘I am flying to Morocco to promote my new series!’
No this post is not about me listing MY successes to you (I WISH someone would fly me to Morocco), but rather what it’s like to hear these kinds of sweet sweet proclamations from others. Specifically your very good friends.
BOOM! Didn’t see that coming did you?
I’m not even talking about a job you were directly competing for, or that you even wanted (or thought you wanted, right up until the moment they told you they booked it, won it, made it). I’m talking about that moment when you hear your friend had a success that has nothing to do with you in the slightest, but you still feel that twinge of jealousy, competition, frustration or a big toxic cocktail of all 3.
You know, that horrible moment you hear the news and instantly feel ‘lesser than,’ your friend instantly feels totally weirded out that you aren’t genuinely celebrating with them (and trust me, they will remember and SOooo not celebrate with you when you also achieve a moment of success) and collectively the two of you are in yet another moment void of support in a worthy actor’s life. Blech.
Now wait wait wait, I’m not saying this just to point the finger and make everyone out there feel like a jackass, I TOTES fall victim to the asshole-friend-who-pretends-to-care-but-really-wishes-it-was-her-success pit. I’m saying all of this as a reminder to find a way to genuinely care about the success of your friend’s. Take care of them in good times, so they will in turn take care of you.
*I’m on a real ‘good-vibes-kick’ today, can you tell?
So yes, it is easy to say you’ll try and stay positive next time you have a ‘Not Your Success Moment’, but how do you deal with it when it really happens?Maybe it’s a case of the moment you hear ‘I did it! I booked the Alien destroyer of the universe on that new movie ‘Captain Explodes-a-lot!’ (who wants to bet that movie title is actually used one day?) you take a teeny moment to allow for all the jealousy, competition, whatever to exist…and THEN go, ‘Holy Bleep, my peer booked the Alien destroyer of the universe?! That’s awesome, I’m so proud to be in such good company.’
Stop hiding from your friends success! Trust me you don’t want to be this guy when your friends come around:
PERSONAL EXAMPLE: My amazing, skilled, insanely creative and smart friends made a little movie last year called 99.7%. It looks slick, is incredibly endearing and funny and just got into a film festival in Austin, Texas. And you know what? They deserve every success with it! It’s a great film and I couldn’t be more proud. Really. Truly. They rock. I bow down.
Here’s a little clip of them on set, just to prove to you I’m not making up friends to prove a point::
Yep. Feelin’ pretty good about them feelin’ good. Now you try!
*ps- that ‘me-looking-like-I’m-probably-having-a-panic-attack-in-the-middle-of-a-school-playground-pic’ was taken by my good friend Suzette, the lovely director, producer and editor of 99.7%, who is also a great photographer. BOOM! Doubly supportive!
*pps- I’m really into dropping the BOOM lately
*ppps- So much so that my alternative title for this post was ‘BOOM’. I may need to be stopped.